one year mark

Ok, so I have to write about this today. This time last year was a very hard week for me. April 16th the VT shooting happened and I live(hometown) about 30 mins from there and know a countless amount of people who go there. April 17th, my grandfather past away. Needless to say, I shed alot of tears this time last year.

First, I want to talk about my grandfather. I will never forget the last conversation I had with him. Last year since I won a special award at my command I got to choose when I got a 4 day weekend. I knew my grandfather wasn't doing that well so this time last year I requested a monday and tuesday off. So I get home and spent time with my family and my grandfather...he had been in the hospital for a few day at this point. The sunday before he past my brother and I went to the hospital to see him. This is what happened as soon as we walked into the room...

Me "Hey grandpa!"

Him "I need my thermas!!"

Bro "umm, it's on the table behind you grandpa."

Him "I know and I can't reach it and I have to pee really bad!"
(since he can't get up to go to the bathroom they had him peeing in this big red thermus)

me "umm, I'm just gonna step outside real quick and let you do your thing grandpa."

It was just so funny considering the circumstances.....it lightened the mood in the room. We sat with him for I don't even know how long and just talked. I was difficult to sit there and talk like nothing was wrong but it was even more difficult to not cry. I was determined not to make it hard on him by crying in front of him.

The very next day

The very next day is when the Virginia Tech shootings happened. I was so scared all day long because I knew so many people that were there. My brother for one and his best friend whom I was very close to also. Plus since I live so close to the school, almost half of every graduating class in my high school attends there. Later when we found out that most of it happened in that 1 classroom I freaked out even more because a very good friend was in that class....or was supposed to be. Him and some of his frat brothers were all hungover and decided not to show up that day. It's really crazy how drinking and being hungover possible saved his life. That was a horrible monday. And it didn't get that much better the next day.

Tuesday I had to leave to come back to Norfolk. As I was saying goodbye to my mom around noon my dad called to tell her that my grandfather had developed fluid in his lungs and wasn't doing well at all. She tried to assure me that everything was ok and sent me on my way. My whole way home tho I had this horrible feeling. When I got to my barracks that night I unpacked took a shower and took a couple of tylenol pms so I could sleep. If I didn't then all my worrying was going to keep me up all nite.

I woke up to a voicemail that morning from my dad telling me that my grandfather past away around 10 the night before. I went to work told my command and was back in my home town by 11:30am. It didn't even really hit me until the viewing. As soon as I walked into the room and saw him laying there, so lifeless...i completely lost it. I ran to the bathroom and cried my eyes out.

My whole point in this post was to say that my grandfather was such a great man, a great person. He loved my grandmother for over 40 years, loved his 3 sons and all of his grandkids. He was an extremely good work ethic, was apart of the Lions club and president of it. He helped with the community and took good care of his horses. I love and miss him very much and just wanted to make it known.